PX This presents THE F&F REVIEW
Hey, sorry we couldn’t make it to "Friends&Family," we were out of town/ had to work/ not invited. We’re really glad we finally managed to come by, though— it’s so nice to see you!
What’s that? You would still like us to take the time to fill out the F&F survey, because you’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you invited 75 people to F&F, and afterward all you got was 41 "Congrats[es]!" 22 "Awesome[s]!" 3 "Ciao[s]!" and 9 "Best of luck[s]!" ?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what friends & family are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What was your first impression?
Oh gee, this is unique. (That’s sarcasm.)
Please rate the Bar:
It’s… typical. (See: The Waverly Inn, Monkey Bar, Minetta Tavern, Hotel Griffou, Abe & Arthur’s, East Side Social Club, Vintry Wine & Whiskey, Rabbit in the Moon…)
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
Oh come on, really? See above.
Please rate the Dining Room:
Smaller than you imagine. Remember how expansive was Village’s dining room? Well, now it seems as though a lot of that is now the open kitchen— which sort of makes you wonder where the kitchen was before. The high ceiling makes it seem much more capacious than the room actually accommodates, and yet, for some reason, less spacious than its prior incarnation. (Dude, maybe it’s like totally an optical illusion!)
Also: see above.
Please rate the BOH:
Ha ha ha ha. See: the first half of above.
I mean seriously though, what is it you expect from this review anyway? An epiphany? You know you’re not going for the food.
Oh wait, I got something BOH for ya. Remember back when someone kept sending e-mails to us, claiming that chef John deLucie was actually not "on leave" from The Waverly Inn as was reported but was, in essence, "fired"? And then deLucie responded via text message refuting those claims? Well, it turns out— apparently, he lied. (So, to whomever was so generously trying to apprise us of the paradox all along: Our bad!)
How was the staff?
Fine. Especially considering it’s pretty much everyone you already know. Which, ya know, can be a good thing. Or sometimes… not. LOL!
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Tuna Tartare, Beet Salad, Pappardelle, Burger / Oh, like you care.
I mean seriously though, what is it you expect from this review anyway? An epiphany? You know you’re not going for the food. Which is probably a good thing, because you’ve had all this stuff already. Yeh, the biscuits too.
What did you like?
It’s conveniently located?
What did you dislike?
The redundancy.
What was your last impression?
"Been there. Done that." That proves I’m fierce, right?
Would you come back?
Hmm, maybe I’ll just wait for the next place just like this to open. It’ll be what— 4 to 6 months, tops?
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Ha ha ha, I’m sure you will! At the next place. Anna Wintour’s maybe.
Everyone’s number one favorite Waverly Inn / Bowery Hotel superstar, Ivo Juhani, is… well… a Superstar! Get it, girl.
I SMELL BOOK DEAL.
:)
Love ya,
Your adoring fans at PX This.
Chef John deLucie of the famous Waverly Inn cooked papardelle with roasted butternut squash and mushrooms at Bloomingdales on Lexington Ave, and you totally missed it. Doesn’t he look cute?
By the way, have you read The Hunger yet? What are you waiting for?
yah so. everybody’s been buzzing bout theBoomBoom! and evidently, pxthis was no exception (it also seems we were the ones who got the information correctly the quickest, but hey what else is new).
then apparently yesterday, our ole buddy steve-lewis (and then grubstreet) broke the news "Kamil Parchomienko will handle the room…" !!
wow! and yay!
those of us who know and love and/or remember former original subMercer GM/Maitre d’ kamil-parchomienko (also of MercerKitchen, SunsetBeach, StandardMiami, and StandardLA) are of course totally delighted that kamil, the prodigal son, has returned to NYC after a loooong time away. hooray!
oh but i kinda feel a little bad for him though, cuz i don’t know whether or not kamil will appreciate his name being alls out there right before he is about to open the hottest spot in town. i mean like for example,
we alls know the WaverlyInn’s emil-varda has a fake name (and business cards). i also know two of my pals who run LaEsquina refrain as best they can from giving out their names too. and for sure, back in the day, i rarely ever gave peoples my real name either.
not that "the press" ever gave a shit who the GM or Maiterdees were before, so that’s a new one, but whatever.
but i digress.
anyhoo. steve-lewis goes on to describe "They want to do two seatings, 4–9 for small plates and 10–2/3 for late night. Super high-end Rainbow Room/Rose Bar/Windows on the World style $18–25 drinks and DP by the glass…"
wow again! and uhhh… kinda… THANK GAWD (?!)
i don’t know about you, but i’m a little sick of places that only cater to young unkempt insomniac kids whose trust funds haven’t quite kicked in yet. not that i ever went to any of those places (mostly cuz ha ahaa i couldn’t get in), but i just think it’s really really great somebody is finally thinking of us "olds" (ya know— the ones with TASTE) and giving us a place we can go and have fun before one o’clock in the fucking morning.
oh! yah— and since you were wondering
the answer is YES! that’s the kamil you’re thinking of. of course it is! who else would it be.
he’s also one half the character "michael" in the series (the other half is current BlueHill@StoneBarns GM, philippe-gouze) and if all goes well, he’ll be played by actor (and former clubUSA bartender) darren-kendrick.
hmmm how many is that now? ha ha ha ahaa haaah i’ll give a crisp new benjamin to the first person who can correctly identify every person in the book who now works at theStandard.
= "personne extraordinaire"