"… Rest peacefully, my Brother, I just came back from a 3 yr long assignment in Iraq, and I dare to say that Justice has been served. Farewell, my Friend, Farewell…" – Damir [Palladium, Tunnel, Club USA]
The following is an excerpt from PX This:
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 2001. 12:15PM
We got terrible news. A friend that B used to work with, “Big Keith,” is missing.
Such a nice guy, big and friendly and cute and good natured and happy. He’s a firefighter and I think nearly his entire squad is gone.
The last time I saw Big Keith was at Sugar in December, and I remember I asked him if he was still thinking about joining the fire department and he replied “I’m IN the fire department!”— so we chatted like wow how fast time flies, the last time I had seen him he was just talking about thinking about joining.
And he bought me a cup of coffee another night too and I felt weird, I wasn’t sure which was more insulting— to offer him money for it or not. I didn’t know the protocol, back at the Gatien’s nobody offered money, they just went and got it the next time.
Big Keith was in the movie The Professional and he was great in it really, even though it was a small role. He played Benny (one of the corrupt cops) and he has one awesome scene where he is standing in the hallway with his gun drawn, nervous and shaking and sweating.
Actually he is so remarkable I mentioned him in “The Ministry of Speed” too, and I guess it’s silly but I liked to imagine my film would actually get made one day and Keith could play one of the doormen and it would actually be the real him they were referring to in the dialogue. Something like that.
I remember one time Keith and I were chatting outside Naked Lunch and I was recounting to him how I’d taped The Professional on the VCR and then I realized “oh whoops you probably don’t want to hear that do you?” thinking it was bad I had videotaped it instead of paying to see it in a theatre. And eeheee he was cute he insisted “No! HBO is good, I’ll take HBO!”
And B says his wife is in denial like she just expects him to come walking in the door any second and my God who can blame her? Because he was just so big and able and strong it seemed like nothing could ever take him down.
Oh my God knock on wood but if something like that were to happen to B, I would be the exact same way, I would have to see it with my own two eyes.
It’s just not the way things are supposed to be.
B was really upset when he told me.
I remember all the funny stories he used to tell about working the door at Naked Lunch, how Keith would just make him laugh and laugh all night long.
Even though B hated doorkeeping so much I know he looks back fondly and proudly because of all the good guys he knows because of it.
And even though I don’t really want to share this with those people, I feel like I want to say something to the Project Greenlighters, all those movie lovers, like they should go out and buy The Professional and tell all their friends, I just want everyone to know when they watch that movie they should look out for him and they can see how great he was and be proud for him he is such a hero.
But I am afraid it will just come out stupid or corny or something.
Hey, did you hear about Mark Birnbaum getting sued for sexual harrassament? [No? Oh, you must live in a fucking cave.]
Discuss.
Cuz you knooow you want to.
COMMENTS ARE OPEN.
How’s this, I’ll start— maybe I’ll just fill in some of the ones I’ve heard out and about so far (jump on in anytime) :
[ Keep scrolling... ]
"… Rest peacefully, my Brother, I just came back from a 3 yr long assignment in Iraq, and I dare to say that Justice has been served. Farewell, my Friend, Farewell…" – Damir [Palladium, Tunnel, Club USA]
The following is an excerpt from PX This:
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 17, 2001. 12:15PM
We got terrible news. A friend that B used to work with, “Big Keith,” is missing.
Such a nice guy, big and friendly and cute and good natured and happy. He’s a firefighter and I think nearly his entire squad is gone.
The last time I saw Big Keith was at Sugar in December, and I remember I asked him if he was still thinking about joining the fire department and he replied “I’m IN the fire department!”— so we chatted like wow how fast time flies, the last time I had seen him he was just talking about thinking about joining.
And he bought me a cup of coffee another night too and I felt weird, I wasn’t sure which was more insulting— to offer him money for it or not. I didn’t know the protocol, back at the Gatien’s nobody offered money, they just went and got it the next time.
Big Keith was in the movie The Professional and he was great in it really, even though it was a small role. He played Benny (one of the corrupt cops) and he has one awesome scene where he is standing in the hallway with his gun drawn, nervous and shaking and sweating.
Actually he is so remarkable I mentioned him in “The Ministry of Speed” too, and I guess it’s silly but I liked to imagine my film would actually get made one day and Keith could play one of the doormen and it would actually be the real him they were referring to in the dialogue. Something like that.
I remember one time Keith and I were chatting outside Naked Lunch and I was recounting to him how I’d taped The Professional on the VCR and then I realized “oh whoops you probably don’t want to hear that do you?” thinking it was bad I had videotaped it instead of paying to see it in a theatre. And eeheee he was cute he insisted “No! HBO is good, I’ll take HBO!”
And B says his wife is in denial like she just expects him to come walking in the door any second and my God who can blame her? Because he was just so big and able and strong it seemed like nothing could ever take him down.
Oh my God knock on wood but if something like that were to happen to B, I would be the exact same way, I would have to see it with my own two eyes.
It’s just not the way things are supposed to be.
B was really upset when he told me.
I remember all the funny stories he used to tell about working the door at Naked Lunch how Keith would just make him laugh and laugh all night long.
Even though B hated doorkeeping so much I know he looks back fondly and proudly because of all the good guys he knows because of it.
And even though I don’t really want to share this with those people, I feel like I want to say something to the Project Greenlighters, all those movie lovers, like they should go out and buy The Professional and tell all their friends, I just want everyone to know when they watch that movie they should look out for him and they can see how great he was and be proud for him he is such a hero.
But I am afraid it will just come out stupid or corny or something.
Hey, have you ever wondered whatever happened to Matt Levine? Oh, no? Well, we’re gonna update you anyway. (It’ll be fun, you’ll see.)
Apparently, Matt Levine "sold" his once uuuüber-hott Eldridge and then went on to undertake some bar/lounge something something at The Hotel on Rivington and then some other stuff happened with some other project he was endeavoring to— oh, whatever— pretty much his whole history is here if you want it. (Hang in there, it gets better.)
Anyhoo, PX This hears Levine was recently ejected from Mister H. We only mention it because: har har aharr, the irony is just killing us.
Evidently, not long ago Levine visited Mister H with actors Bryan Greenberg and Eddie Kaye Thomas of HBO’s How to Make It in America. According to a source from within, despite being seated at "the best table in the house," Levine soon became irate with the waitress who offered him a "bottle menu," speaking rudely and condescendingly to her. The frustrated waitress then summoned the host, whom Levine allegedly manhandled (by grabbing his elbow) and berated with the words, "Look into my eyes. I own three clubs in New York, and I don’t buy bottles. People send me bottles." Unmoved, the inured and apathetic host in turn summoned the manager, aaand "… within about three sentences, she was over him," too.
Levine and his guests were then summarily shown the door.
Another source who chooses to remain anonymous sums it up thusly: "Mathematically, if A is arrogance, and B is bottles, then two C-list actors is definitely not equal or greater than A minus B."
Or rather: 2 x C ≠ or > A – B
Got it? (See, fun and educational!)
We’re just sayin’.
UPDATE: Matt Levine responds via e-mail and has this to say:
"I have nothing but respect for… people in the industry… but come on – this story is bogus and wacky. Not sure where you got your information, but it is completely inaccurate and completely false… Isn’t even an inkling of facts or truth. Even the "quotes" — that is nothing close to what I would ever say, and I never even interacted with a waitress. It’s amazing how a story can be completely made up…"
Matt Levine also graciously requested we remove this narrative from our website. And we would (because, quite frankly, it just doesn’t matter that much to us), but since Eater has already more widely spread our little anecdote, the point just seems kinda moot now. And removing it altogether would probably just serve to increase the curiosity about what the report entailed, possibly fueling even more outlandish "fabrications" in the end.
In any case, the bottom line is this: sometimes stories like this need to be taken with a grain of salt— by ALL parties involved, including our audience. Had this been an account of Levine blowing rails in a banquette or banging hookers in the bathroom, perhaps we would have "fact check[ed]" first, as Levine would have "appreciate[d]." However, in this particular circumstance, we simply didn’t believe anybody would have a reason to make up a tale as absurd as this— nor a "quote" as utterly fabulous as "Look into my eyes…"
This is simply an amusing anecdote, meant to entertain— about an endlessly faaascinating industry, about a person within that industry who, like it or not, has successfully captivated and retained your decidedly limited attention span. So ya know— I guess yalls should ponder that one for a minute, bitches.
In short: We wholeheartedly thank Matt Levine for his courteous and heartfelt response. (And perhaps humbly suggest that next time, he more advantageously train his stupid fucking door people.)
God bless New York, God bless America and the First Amendment, and God bless us all, everyone. We would further venture to ask: Can’t we all just get along? But ha ha ahaa that would just be retarded.
Carry on, mutherfukkers.
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me (Summer 2011), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
MORE on Nightlife
Following yesterday’s news of a shakeup at The Box, we hear nightlife fixture Aalex Julien has left EMM Group’s Simyone Lounge (aka SL). In a somewhat ironic twist, partners Mark Birnbaum and Eugene Remm have evidently required all operatives to sign a Non-Compete Agreement— a move Remm might possibly have appropriated from Steve Hanson‘s BR Guest, having once overseen BR Guests’s very first foray in nightlife, Level V, formerly housed in the basement space under (defunct) Meatpacking District restaurant Vento (currently Dos Caminos), located mere blocks from EMM properties, SL and Tenjune.
Apparently, the rigid Non-Compete includes provisos on non-employment with rival entities for designated extended periods, and allegedly bars impresarios from further related employment in NYC at any time. Obviously, this proves problematic for Julien, who once openly admitted to surveying "other projects," at least one of which was situated in "the Meatpacking."
Julien has worked with EMM for several years, manning the entrance to Tenjune since its inception in September of 2006.
photo: Melissa Hom for Grubstreet, New York Magazine
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me (Summer 2011), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
This just in: Nightlife impresario and Calvin Klein play pal, Nick Rytting, has decamped from The Box, where until last week he retained the title of General Manager. He currently joins co-owners and (longtime F&Bulous operatives) Larry Poston and Johnny Swet at Hotel Griffou.
The move is a logical one for Rytting, some of whose friends and followers within the industry raised eyebrows and expressed skepticism when Rytting departed F&B for Nightlife’s notoriously tumultuous Team Hammerstein, following his years-long stint at La Esquina.
Hotel Griffou, which recently replaced original beleaguered chef Jason Giordano with Bouley and Per Se alum David Santos, now seems perfectly poised to reclaim its initial über-hot status, as Poston (formerly of The Waverly Inn and Pastis), Swet (formerly of Freemans and The Park), and Rytting must surely constitute downtown’s F&B Power-Pulchritudinous A-Gay trifecta.
Stay tuned.
This has been a PX This PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
See also (earlier): On Nick Rytting
photo by Kristin Brown
* * * * *
Have you heard?
Until the release of PX Me (Summer 2011), this website will henceforth be updated only intermittently (approximately once or twice a week).
Abbe Diaz’s new (daily) blog is now at: abbediaz.com
PX This presents THE F&F REVIEW
Hey, sorry we couldn’t make it to "Friends&Family," we were out of town/ had to work/ not invited. We’re really glad we finally managed to come by, though— it’s so nice to see you!
What’s that? You would still like us to take the time to fill out the F&F survey, because you’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you invited 75 people to F&F, and afterward all you got was 41 "Congrats[es]!" 22 "Awesome[s]!" 3 "Ciao[s]!" and 9 "Best of luck[s]!" ?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what friends & family are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What was your first impression?
Oh, how did I not realize it’s across the street from Tao? Competing with yourself— nice.
Please rate the Bar:
OK. Not very welcoming (there’s an odd nightclubesque dearth of seats) and small, considering. How/why there are three people squeezed back there is completely beyond me (the dining room has its own "service" bar in the back). It makes them look about as graceful as three rats in a breadbox.
It’s also very, uh… Las Vegas?
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
The cocktail list is decent, about a dozen classics with a just twist or two (Tanteo Jalapeño Tequila, e.g.) and priced on the higher side at $14 each. The wines by the glass are fine and fair if not particularly adventurous. Didn’t manage to get a look at the wines by the bottle, because they grabbed the list away so quickly (maybe they needed it for someone else), but I would bet it’s relatively typical. Carnac the Magnificent says: Expect a range of "safe" selections skewed toward the $50 and up range.
Please rate the Dining Room:
It’s actually pretty cramped for such a sizeable room. Way to wedge thoses asses in there!
Please rate the BOH:
Not bad. The menu looks pretty expensive until you’re informed the plates "are all meant for sharing." And yeah— the’re huge.
All the steakhouse basics with "traditional" Italian thrown in. It’s very, uh… Las Vegas.
How was the staff?
Our waitress was good. A lot more adept than her minidress and big hoop earrings insinuate. Everyone else is very, uh… Las Vegas?
(Can’t help but notice the three hatcheckers are the cutest girls in the place. I’m just sayin’.)
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
Meatball with Whipped Ricotta : Good. Huge. Simple but succulent and tasty.
Tuna Tartare : Not bad. Also huge. Layered over avocado. Very reminiscent of uh… Las Vegas, actually. Decent quality but not extraordinary.
Eggplant Parmigiano : Whoa, it’s gigantic, enough for three people. Or maybe, ya know, two people from Las Vegas. Other than that, it’s… OK.
Sauteed Wild Mushrooms : Just a bit overcooked but flavorful enough. Anomalously, its portion size doesn’t quite live up to its $10 pricetag.
What did you like?
The meatball?
What did you dislike?
Umm, overall, it’s just not my… style?
What was your last impression?
This is sort of what I would have imagined Morandi would look like. Except with male bartenders.
Would you come back?
Wellll, I’ve only ever been to Tao once, and it’s right across the street.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
Thanks, have a good night.
Oi! So, you think you know what’s what, what? Well, let yer ol’ chum Mark Baker tell you the bloody score, chap. This nightlife business isn’t all jolly good fun ‘n games, innit. This is serious bloody business; you’d be positively knackered and gobsmacked if you’d ever seen some of thing ‘e’s been through. Bloody bollocks, some of it! So, sit yer arse down and ‘ave a lesson. Or bugger off, slag!
Pip pip, cheerio and all that rot.
*See also (earlier):
• Mark Baker’s wedding to Vicky Andren
• PX This presents: The Travel Series
** And, for even more on Mark Baker, read PX This – The Revised Edition (and PX This Too – Coming Soon in the Summer of 2010)
PX This presents THE F&F REVIEW
Hey, sorry we couldn’t make it to "Friends&Family," we were out of town/ had to work/ not invited. We’re really glad we finally managed to come by, though— it’s so nice to see you!
What’s that? You would still like us to take the time to fill out the F&F survey, because you’d love to take advantage of all our vast experience, knowledge, insight, and expertise as long as we’re already here? Because you invited 75 people to F&F, and afterward all you got was 41 "Congrats[es]!" 22 "Awesome[s]!" 3 "Ciao[s]!" and 9 "Best of luck[s]!" ?
Of course, we’d be honored. Oh ha, yesss, we’ll be honest— brutally honest even, ha ha! After all, that’s what friends & family are for!
No no please, don’t send anything more, we’re stuffed, we can’t breathe, you’ll have to roll us out of here, ha ha ha… !
What was your first impression?
oh, here we go. another one of these…
Please rate the Bar:
okay. small, but comfortable. nice enough. and the bartender is sweet— poor child, in that hideous awful uniform.
Please rate the drinks/ cocktails/ wine:
ugh i’d already started my evening elsewhere so i completely forgot to look to the wine list. sorry! but one of my guests this evening is a wine aficionado, and she opted for glass of wine, so the offerings can’t be all bad. there’s a pretty sparse selection of liquor though— the bartender did say they’re "working on" the inventory and was kind enough to make note of my request for don-julio blanco. but they did have chopin, so— somebody’s thinking.
also: SoHo prices. of course.
but yet: stoli bev naps. whatever, kids.
Please rate the Dining Room:
it’s okay but personally i think the front dining area is sightly nicer than the back. i would have done it differently, but hey— to each his own. actually i thought it was better than the photo i’d already seen, but my wine snob buddy commented something along the lines of: "was some of this shit here already [in its prior incarnation]? cuz i can’t imagine anyone would throw this look together on purpose." oh snap.
i didn’t think it was that bad— on the contrary, i can well imagine someone did throw this look together very much on purpose (and probably got paid for it too). but i mean, really— i’ve seen worse. (i kinda like the "chandeliers"!)
really bad acoustics, however.
Please rate the BOH:
pretty good. seriously, better than i expected— especially from one of these joints. yesss, Beba is so totally jumping face forward into the whole tired assed nightclub posing as restaurant trend. you just have to take one look at all the lovely staff ladies in those hideous awful uniforms to know this— Hooters® by marc-jacobs (or some shit).
so, i feel a little bad for the poor, sure to be underappreciated BOH. but maybe they’re making such great salaries in the club business they really couldn’t care less.
How was the staff?
sweet. lovely. very pretty. and friendly. those poor girls in those hideous awful fucking uniforms.
What did you eat?/ How was the food?
i just tried a bunch of the smaller things cuz, like i said, i wasn’t expecting the food to be that good. there was the "selection of spreads," calamari salad, salmon and tuna tartar, keftedes (meatballs), and grilled sausages. and it was all quite good. a bit fancy (there’s the whole bit with the ice cream scoop presentation for the hummus and taramosalata etc, e.g.) but certainly not cloyingly so. and really very tasty. clean, quality execution. a great twist on greek classics, made with an undoubtedly accomplished, artful hand.
but who cares, right? i know i know, you’re a little too busy right now ogling the Hooters® by marc-jacobs.
What did you like?
the food was really a very pleasant surprise.
What did you dislike?
did i mention how i feel for those poor lovely ladies? i’d rather work for lois-freedman than don one of those atrocious things. and you knooow i mean that shit literally.
What was your last impression?
well, it was sweet of fellow diner matt-levine to say "nice meeting you!"— but uhh, we didn’t actually meet. duh.
Would you come back?
bar, drinks, nibbles— sure, i think so.
Thank you, and hope to see you soon!
thank you, and best of luck to you.
It’s Friday, let’s dance! In keeping with New York Magazine‘s upcoming article on the legendary Limelight and its impending transition into a shopping mall— PX This urges you to: WORRRK.
(If Madonna calls, I’m at "Boom Boom.")
Juliet Supper Club would like to announce it has forsaken BonBon Tuesdays (formerly hosted by Kenny Kenny and Susanne Bartsch) for… uh… hot angry lesbians?
Whatever! Get it, girl.
Starting TONIGHT…
**See also (earlier): "BonBon Tuesdays Now Defunct"
Kenny Kenny regrets to inform you that Juliet Supper Club has forsaken Tuesday night BonBon, co-hosted by Susanne Bartsch (and once by Tinsley Mortimer), for "the bottle-service crowd." He states, "Uck. See you at Vandam Sundays at Greenhouse!"
For shame, Juliet! Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon/ Who is already sick and pale with grief… Oh forget it, never mind.
:(
Aaaand, that’s the state of nightlife…
** See also (earlier):
• "SPOTTED: Rosario Dawson at BonBonTuesdays"
• "VANDAM Fashion Week -by Kenny Kenny"
Rosario Dawson at Tuesday night BonBon hosted by Kenny Kenny and Susanne Bartsch at Juliet Supper Club.
• See also (earlier): "SPOTTED: (Volume 20)"
* With special thanks to Kenny Kenny
wow look what i found. "to mr. fuji’s house of pain…" :)
that’s where i first met gilbert-stafford, at Mr.Fuji’s. how many people went from CoffeeShop to Mr.Fuji’s? there was even a rumor charles-milite almost had a nervous breakdown in the office. [no offense, charles we love you xo.]
what a time.
Rest in Peace, Gilbert Stafford.
♡
(sorry i didn’t make it last night.)
- image courtesy of frank151.com
= "personne extraordinaire"